But guess what- the blogs I love to read and the speakers I love to listen to don't make a deep spiritual point in everything they write. They just share about their everyday lives and the funny things that happen when they least expect it. And- just like humor that cuts into a boring day or even a tense situation – sometimes the Lord will give insight that begs to be shared. So- here we go again…
That actually really sounds like a long, dumb “why I've been gone” story. Sorry.
Cell phones can be very damaging to social interaction. First- because people are constantly looking down at their cell phones and not looking into the faces of the ones they love and listening to what they have to say. This is the real, serious reason that many deep, spiritual articles are written about. And posted on Facebook. So you can read it instead of looking into the faces of the folks you are with at the time.
But that's not why we're here, remember?
I want to talk about another, much more fun and hilarious way that cell phones are damaging to social interaction. With cell phone texting- you can say something to the person beside you silently. Something that you would never even lean over and whisper- for fear that the other people around you might hear.
One example would be a text I once received during a funeral: “Did that man in front of us just fart???”
See- that's funny. I don't care who you are. You are laughing. (If you're not- then just close this out now. I don't think this is the place for you).
It's VERY funny. Especially if the man in front of you at the funeral did, indeed, fart. A rolling expulsion of hot air that bubbled up on the hard wooden pew back and made a sound just loud enough to be disruptive. Only- you can't laugh during funerals. This situation- combined with a text coming from the pew behind you- is enough to take down Billy Graham, in my opinion.
I was strong. Almost. Everyone thought I got strangled and had a coughing fit. Except for the people who also heard the man fart.
So yesterday we were sitting in a doctor’s office. The “we” being Katie, Zeb and me. It does not take three people for a doctor’s appointment- but since it was out of town- we made a day of it. We, of course, found somewhere good to eat, and also went shopping at the outlet mall – where we saw three obviously foreign tourists posing for a picture in front of the Nike outlet. Thus proving the international popularity of my favorite brand of shoes, AND the impressiveness of the spectrum of retail shopping experiences we enjoy here in America as opposed to other countries in our world. Good grief…
Back to the doctor’s office. While we were sitting in the waiting area, which was quiet save for the loudness of the LSU colored daisy headband the receptionist was wearing, Katie noticed something. (Katie notices EVERTHING- managing occasionally to keep some things to herself. Occasionally.) Anyway, she noticed something about the lady sitting across from us. She texts this to Zeb, while smiling. Zeb texts it to me, and here the situation escalates. I receive the text “That woman over there is reading Green Eggs and Ham”. I look up to see an older, nicely dressed woman indeed reading the epic novel. Written by the noted author, Dr. Seuss.
Now- I love children's books. Love them. But something about the way this woman was reading this book struck me funny. She was intently concentrating on each page- reading slowly and thoughtfully before turning the page with scholarly preciseness. I've seen few people read medical magazine articles with such fervor. The nonsensical, rhyming, sing-song words of this epic novel began to run through my head. And I let out a small giggle.
This was akin to touching a match to an open can of kerosene. Zeb began to laugh. His entire body was wracked with uncontrollable giggles. He bolted for the door and went out to the hall to try and compose himself. It didn't work. Katie and I began to get tickled just listening to this infectious sound now echoing from the empty corridor. People began to look at us, including the reading lady. She did not stop- just looked over her glasses like an annoyed school marm. Zeb came back to get the car key. While standing by Katie, waiting, he let out a snort while trying to hold in his mirth. Now EVERYONE looked over. He finally made it to the elevator and left the scene.
Shortly afterward, Katie was called back. I was left by myself on the plush couch, getting the “stink eye” from the reading lady every few moments. She finally finished the book- savoring it until the climactic ending. I eventually settled myself down and read my book on my Ipad. Zeb, however, never returned. We found him in the car once the whole appointment shebang was over. He was, of course, playing on his cell phone.
I know that thirty years from now- we will still remember fondly “the lady reading ‘Green Eggs and Ham’”.
Speaking of thirty years from now- and the concept of my still being alive thirty years from now- give the following “New Years Inspirational Thought” to end this meaningful entry:
If you need to make lifestyle changes – do it as soon as you can. Don't wait until you HAVE to make them. It's not nearly as much fun to make them because you HAVE to.
Yuck. And sigh…
Happy New Year, Y'all. From all the gang at Pizza Hut Heights.